March 2012
Reblog if you've been told "nice ass"
*Hears noises at night*: Well this is it this is the end for me I had a good life
*Gets shampoo in my eyes*: I guess I'm blind now how am I going to go on holy shit
*Heart is beating fast*: I think I am having a heart attack is this what cardiac arrest is
*A cop walks by*: Here I go about to get arrested I probably murdered someone I'm sure they know about when I smoked that one time
*Taking a test*: Don't take your eyes off of this paper you will get caught cheating and get kicked out of school
*Gets a sunburn*: Skin cancer
It's not the same...
most-awkward-moments:
Girls say “Suck my dick” everyone’s like
Dudes say “Lick my pussy” everyone’s like
When my mom is baking and asks if anyone wants to...
most-awkward-moments:
When my sibling insults me →
totally-relatable:
My parents are like:
But if I insult my sibling, my parents are like:
4ever not attractive xoxoxox
I'd rather date a redneck than a pretty boy who...
When your teacher ask you if you get the lesson →
when they’re looking at you
and you’re like:
and When he looks away
you look at your friend like:
My mother and I were changing the words to Adele's...
theepichumor:
Mom: Kristie, what soda do you want, Pepsi? Me: Yeah… Wait. NEVER MIND I WANT SOME MOUNTAIINN DEWWW. *few minutes later* Me: Ma, which vegetable do you want? Mom: I WANT NOTHING BUT THE BEST BROCCOLI TOOOOOOO. *few minutes later* Mom: Hey, get out the list. Me: why… So we DON’T FORGET MEAT, I BEG Mom: I’LL REMEMBER CAUSE YOU SAID Me: SOMETIMES WE GROCERY SHOP AND SOMETIMES...
theepichumor:
Day off: Tumblr Need to study: Tumblr Shitty weather: Tumblr Wonderful and sunny weather: Tumblr Plans with other people: Tumblr In class: Tumblr Supposed to be sleeping: Tumblr Watching TV: Tumblr On the bus: Tumblr The apocalypse: Tumblr During my own funeral: Tumblr Everywhere: Tumblr Tumblr: Tumblr
Pillow Fights →
the-absolute-funniest-posts:
Expectation:
Reality:
Dropping your phone.
theepichumor:
The first time:
The next few times:
After a million times:
After a billion times:
